So today I'm starting to try and come to terms with having to give up playing the piano, as one of the things on the (long) list of things I'm gonna try and deal with with the help of this book I've been rambling on about.
I used to play and take lessons when I was a kid, and I was pretty good at it. I quit when I was 10 because, well, I'm not too sure now - I think I felt like it was something my parents were forcing me into, so I suppose it was some kind of pre-teen rebellion. Who the hell knows. Anyway, my efforts to take it back up again since I was about 14 have been hampered by my RSI - Repetitive Strain Injury - which I now have in both wrists. It makes playing almost impossible, especially the things I enjoy playing the most, with lots of big stretches and octaves and what have you. It's taken me a long time, but I've had to finally admit that I just can't play any more, and I can't make up for the years I lost when I was younger. I can't reclaim that talent I had, and make something of it. I wish I could, almost more than anything. But I can't - and I need to accept that.
So I've been through the Exploration and Expression, next comes Comfort. Not really sure how I'm going to go about comforting myself for such a big loss that I've been struggling with for so many years, but I'll have to come up with something. I think it will definitely involve watching The Holiday, which is the most feel-good movie ever ;) [Music by Hans Zimmer - what could go wrong?] But the later stage of Perspective will probably play a big role in Comfort too, because I find putting things into perspective very comforting. Anyway. We'll see.
In the mean time, any comfort from other people will be greatly appreciated =)
Take care guys xx
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